I think I want to again write about the experience with my illness and how it is to make chemotherapy for a malignant brain tumor, I get the impression that is forgotten in turn, I really like to I live. I do NOT write "... as I live." Because I could not pick me if I want to live my life the way I need it now.
Also, if I have already (or less) set up that I have an incurable, chronic, life-shortening disease. Is it not so that I "sit here with a shoe." It's probably a bit flippant formulated rather that "my life has become quite manageable." If I believe in my kind of humor, no one wants: I suffer. Although it sounds pathetic.
Or how would you interpret the following sentences? ...
went Recently I (the circumstances) relatively well.
Apart from the 17 focal epileptic attacks in the past 32 days, despite the 2x1500 mg Keppra tablets per day, whereas I am (by default), I had no major problems.
Maybe I flatter myself is that I can not speak for minutes, even though I want it. Probably I make it myself only that I have extreme difficulty in concentration and with each attack for several minutes'm not able to make a simple decision. Probably I'll make it to me only when I stand in the shower and thought "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town" and sing it "stuck" and sing the text to end when either compulsively.
Apart from the nausea and constipation during the 5 days Temodal -single name and the uncertainty about the long-term effects of chemotherapy (if I have the experience), I'm fine.
Apart from the fact that I come almost every day, suddenly and without warning several times the tears when I realize that I have my diagnosis with an average survival of 2-5 years, I feel good.
Apart from the fact that I'm trying though, to think reasonably positive and live my life as a visual artist to be as normal as possible, but because of the attacks, the chemotherapy, weekly blood counts and psychotherapy, the ongoing paperwork for benefits, ACTUALLY, I am entitled to, the constant demands of office, because even if I am sick of non-belief that I have to endure a life-threatening illness, can not, I'm fine.
Apart from the fact that I any / r on the fingers have to see whether he / she also does what he should / do it - namely as a (r) of the many doctors, nurses, social workers, social insurance clerk, hospital employees, employment office staff , social services employees, LVA-employees, employees of the GEZ (by the way all of them many times my "income rich" earn € 347 a month), to just do their job, I'm fine.
Apart the fact that my human dignity is trampled in the welfare office every once in anew with feet, even though the Basic Law of the FRG is clear that human dignity is inviolable, I'm fine.
Apart from the fact that I am up to 04.30.2008 the missing documents to submit for my application for Social and Responsible Lord until 04/27/2008 holidays, I'm fine.
is basically me so well that almost seems to me the sun from the most ass. You would not believe it, so good for me to feel. Basically, one must already be envious of me because I have such a chance as this malignant brain tumor, which is so wonderful to relax and the so- a wonderful excuse, why I can not work.
And then I do it all no matter how successful the material of my work that I can issue in an off-space in Vienna, to which not even come to my former professors convenient, because it is those of unknown (?) Although they had assured me verbally that they want to see the exhibition "certainly".
I'm doing so well that I will soon become famous for sure, if only I can muster the patience or when I'm dead.
I'm doing so well that I'll survive sure if I just believe it hard enough.
I'm doing so well that God will help me even if I only believe it hard enough and pray.
I'm doing so well that I better be happy that I did not even worse.
I'm doing so well that I'm running up from such a cynic, as the Berlin Finance Senator Thilo Sarrazin can be reckon with how little money I could eat me "wholesome and healthy." Just that I can then spend money on drugs because I usually stop eating when the belt has a little tighter.
I'm doing so well that I wonder how I ever was able to without this disease on sensitive thing as luck. I still get all of it purely inserted from the front and rear.
I want Love you, thank you "friends"! If I have such friends, I need me after all zuzulegen no enemies. Not that I could not. This is not difficult.
will want to be someone upset about it, as I have here in this blog title, insult, demonstrations. But you edited the other's nose and ask yourself: will you share with me?
If it were, I would be happy to work and make my illness. Any idiots job. I was and am also not too bad for "toilet cleaning. Although it would be a waste of a man with three very good qualification, which is several times of Gifted and prices "sidestepped just" to make such a work . Let But if the money is right, I clean the shit out of you even the toilets in car parks. (I've done this before as a holiday job at the beginning of my studies).
Unfortunately I get for not more money than I would get with Hartz IV - if you would pay me more and I do not deport, social welfare, where I have to show everything again. Where can I "prove" once again say that I have cancer. And where "property boundaries" are from 2600 € for those unable to work before the welfare office also puts out a cent.
cancer patients, but we are just social parasites. The society must endure just. We always have a fine excuse for why we do not ride off can not you?
, enough whining. Now think back positive. Otherwise I would still as evil as my tumor ...
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